By Benjamin Shapiro
I read the news today, oh boy.

A president tweeted about cavfefe,

While that’s the headline of the day,

He looked at Paris and he walked away.  

I read some memes today, oh boy. 

D-list celeb beheads the president,

Outraged folks speaking their minds, 

But it’s all a waste of time, 

Ignoring bigger crimes,

I’d like to turn it off. 

Woke up, got out of bed,

Lifted weights, the kids are fed. 

Being busy’s the only way

To keep existential crises at bay. 

Bought some crap I didn’t need,

Even though there’s mouths to feed. 

Drove my car, though I could’ve walked,

At climate change, I always balk. 

I read the news today, oh boy. 

Russia, Trump,  impending World War III. 

I stick my head into the sand,

But it goes on and on and on and…

I’d like to turn it off.

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