Part III
Read Part I
Read Part II
Last Exit to Eldritch
The Jankowski Brothers had been using the old Penske van, nicknamed The Big Cheese, for fifteen years to tour the midwest and it had begun to show its age with increasing frequency in the last few months. As they drove toward Eldritch, it began to make sounds like a dubstep DJ had somehow taken control of the engine.
“Come on, baby,” said Al, “let’s just get you into town and I’ll give you whatever you need.”
“She needs a bullet to the engine block. I miss the old tour bus,” said Frank.
“Don’t listen to him, Cheese,” Al said, patting the dashboard, “you’re as good as any old tour bus.”
The Big Cheese listened to Al and they coasted into Eldritch as the sun set. They pulled over in front of Daisy’s Diner just as her engine died with a horrible grinding sound. Al pulled the key out of the dead ignition and looked sadly at the blinking ‘check engine’ light.
“We’ll have to find a mechanic if we want to get out of here after the festival,” said Al.
“Or a used car lot. I think she may be dead.”
“Ah well, let’s take a look around, shall we?”
The brothers stepped out of the car into Eldritch, which looked like a ghost town. All of the shop lights were off and there wasn’t a human to be seen anywhere.
“Hello,” yelled Frank, his voice echoing, “is anybody home?”
There was no answer, only the sound of unseen cicadas and toads. Frank and Al decided to walk down Main Street, hoping to bump into someone who could tell them where they could hole up for the night. As they walked, the wooden heels of their boots echoed through the empty town. They looked around in disbelief.
“I really hope this wasn’t just someone fucking with us,” Al said as they walked.
“Yeah,” said Frank, “something about this is weird, Al.”
Every few steps, one or the other of the brothers would call out into the darkness, hoping for a response, but none came until they had reached the far end of Main Street.
“Hello,” yelled Al.
“Hello,” yelled a voice from the darkness.
“Hello,” yelled Frank.
“Hello,” yelled the voice again excitedly.
“Who’s there?”
“Me!”
“Who is me?”
“I don’t know who you are,” said a man stepping out onto the street, ” but I’m Jared.”
The brothers looked at the smiling figure before him. He looked genuinely happy to see them, as if relieved not to be alone anymore. He wore dirty clothes and had only one shoe on. He looked a bit malnourished, too.
“Jared?” Frank asked.
“The one and only. Who are yous?”
“Frank and Al Jankowski,” replied Al.
“Who?”
“The Polka Kings of Wisconsin.”
“Uh-huh.”
“We’re here for the Polka Festival,” said Frank.
“The what? There ain’t no Polky Festival here. There ain’t nothing here no more.”
“This man is an idiot,” Al whispered to Frank.
“We need to find someone else to talk to,” Frank whispered back.
“I know I’m dumb, but I ain’t deaf,” said Jared, “and I’m the only one left.”
“Where did everyone else go, Jared?”
“They all gone to church,” replied Jared, pointing towards the pitch black outside of Eldritch, “must be a long service, cause they ain’t beened back in days and days.”
Suddenly, as if in response to Jared, the sound of an accordion and clarinet was carried on the breeze out of the pitch black. As the men looked, the song grew louder and a droning chant-like version of the lyrics joined the instruments.
“Strike up the music the band has begun
The Pennsylvania Polka.
Pick out your partner and join in the fun
The Pennsylvania Polka.
It started in Scranton, it’s now No 1
It’s bound to entertain you
Everybody has a mania
To do the polka from Pennsylvania”
As the last word faded, ghostly figures began to appear out of the darkness. The group started singing again as the ambled slowly down the middle of the street, shuffling as if in a trance. The Jankowski Brothers watched in disbelief as the figures came closer, but Jared looked excited.
“Church is out! Church is out! I see my mama!”
Jared ran up to one of the people in the group and grabbed her.
“Mama! Mama! I missed you so much! Come on home and we can watch the TeeVee!”
The woman brushed off his grasp as she walked by, causing tears to appear in Jared’s eyes. He ran up to Frank and Al, distraught.
“What is wrong with mama?”
“I- I don’t know,” said Al, “but whatever it is it got the whole town.”
“And we’re trapped here.”
The hypnotized townsfolk formed a circle around the three men, their voices becoming deafening as they continued to sing accompanied by the blaring clarinet and accordion.
“While they’re dancing
Everybody’s cares are quickly gone
Sweet romancing
This goes on and on until the dawn
They’re so carefree
Gay with laughter happy as can be
They stop to have a beer
Then the crowd begins to cheer
They kiss and then they start to dance again.”
And then, there was silence. The three men looked around at the staring figures, wondering if this would be their end.
That was when they heard the first scream. It came from somewhere in the back of the crowd. Then another voice joined in. Soon, the whole crowd was shrieking. The cacophony was maddening. Just as suddenly as it began, it stopped.
The man in front of Al began to blink his eyes hard, as if coming out of a trance. Soon, everybody around them was doing the same.
“What the Hell is going on here,” asked a man in a suit.
“I’d like to ask the same thing,” said Frank.
“Mayor Josef, yous have been in church for days,” said Jared, “don’t ya ‘member?”
“Church,” replied the man in the suit, “what do you mean?”
“I heared music coming from the church and yous all started walking out of town to the black church. You know, the old movie set. I was scared, ’cause my mama just walked out the door in her moomoo. Mama, you out there?”
“Yes dear,” said Jared’s Mama parting the crowd, “I’m here.”
She looked weak and bedraggled, her skin a shade of gray.
“Let’s go home,” she said, “mama’s tired.”
Jared took her by the hand and they walked off, as did most of the confused crowd. Soon, the only people left were Frank, Al, and Mayor Josef.
“So,” Frank said, “I assume there isn’t an Inaugural Eldritch Polka Festival?”
Benjamin Shapiro- Writer 